Power-Decade Parenting

Family Friday: The Case Against "Cherish Every Season"

Published about 2 months ago • 2 min read

Family Friday Newsletter - 2 min read

by: Finley Robinson

A Single Sentence from a Season Ahead

Knowing each child individually helps create a beautiful bond between you both.

We Didn't "Cherish Every Season"

If there's one emotion that parents don't need while raising a young family, it's shame. It's that feeling of pain or guilt that emerges when mom or dad realizes they don't measure up.

I have felt it on many occasions and I reckon you have too.

I remember taking my kids to the entrance of certain rides at Disney when they were little. We walked up to the board only to discover they were a few inches short of the required minimum height.

The look on their face was impossible to bear. So much disappointment when they were told they couldn't experience the fun of the ride.

That same look of disappointment shows up on young parent's faces all the time and it happens when they hear this three-word-phrase...

Cherish Every Season.

I hated being given those instructions from older parents. Why? Well, because when you are honest about whatever season you're currently in there is plenty of hard that you won't cherish.

Teething is hard.
Not sleeping is hard.
Temper tantrums are hard.

Picky eaters are hard.
Potty training is hard.
Sibling fights are hard.

Learning multiplication is hard.
Winter birthday parties are hard.
Three different school drop-offs are hard.

Cliques are hard.
Social media is hard.
Tryouts for the team are hard.

Dinner every night is hard.
Managing screen time is hard.
Letting hobbies go dormant is hard.

Cherish Every Season was consistent parenting advice we received that never sat well with me and I've never passed along to others.

What it attempts to communicate is that the older parent misses the best parts of specific seasons. Instead what that phrase does is it minimizes the hard parts of your season.

In doing so, a cycle of shame repeats itself over and over. Instead of being honest about the hard and appreciating each season's sweetness, parents are told they don't measure up if they can't cherish every season.

Don't Suffer In Shame

There are things I miss about having little kids running around my house. There are also a lot of hard realities that I'm thankful are behind me too.

Be as present as you can in each season with your kids and fight against hurrying them along too fast. Why? Because ...

Smash cakes are special.
The first steps are magical.

After the bath snuggles are wonderful.
Being greeted at the door with screams of joy is legendary.

The first goal scored is beautiful.
Witnessing a kindergarten crush is adorable.

Campfire s'mores are delicious.
Stomping in a rain puddle is glorious.

The first sleepover is lovely chaos.
Riding without training wheels is grand.

Doing their own laundry is magnificent.
Suddenly caring about fashion is surprising.

Talent shows are entertaining.
Summer pool parties are marvelous.

Big Idea: Don't succumb to shame when you don't love everything about your current season of parenting.

The 3-Part Family Framework

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Power-Decade Parenting

By Finley Robinson

Helping propel moms & dads of 3 to 13 year-olds to invest in their power-decade of parenting. Father of 3 teenagers and pastor of 20 years turned digital writer.

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