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This week is my newsletter's 1-year anniversary, so I've decided to give the look and feel a slight makeover. I'm also working on compiling some of the stories and applications into separate themes in order to create small digital products. I hope you'll stay tuned...

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Sleep Aid

There was a 7-year period in my home where sleep was as hard to find as a snow owl in winter. It was the toughest on my wife by far.

She was born a light sleeper, which meant she had a perfect ear for our kid's cries in the middle of the night. I often slept through it unless she shook me awake to help.

So in an effort to contribute, I would get up early with the 3-year-old or stay up late with the 5-year-old.

From what I gathered from my friends, our kids were average sleepers. They didn't sleep as much as others, but they could sleep almost anywhere.

We have pictures of my son passed out on the couch and in the car.

My youngest took the brunt of the erratic sleep opportunities, being toted around to the big kid's activities. She is more resilient for it today.

She slept on the couch, in the back seat after school pickup, and even in the grocery cart. We might have fallen asleep watching a movie together a time or two also.

During that 7-year period, I had weeks where I wasn't sure our family would ever find our way back to a consistent sleep schedule. We had nights of tears (as parents!) begging our kids to go back to sleep.

As an adult, it's baffling that something so fundamental to our daily lives could be so easily disrupted during the young kid season.

The look on the face of a mom and dad with 3 kids under 5 will tell the whole story without saying a word.

I know it may sound hollow if you are reading this during your second cup of coffee by 8 am in order to stay awake, but sleep will come. Someday, you will get seven days in a row of 7-8 hours of sleep.

I'm not a pediatrician nor am I a sleep coach, but I wanted to offer a few possible short bites of hope to you sleep weary parents.

Fast Facts ...

• All parents need sleep. Some days are better or worse than others. You'll likely be at your most vulnerable during the sleep-deprived years, so be conscience of your mind, body, and heart.
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• Kids require sleep also. How they choose to get it is rarely the way you want them to, especially in the first 4-5 years.
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• Sleep is usually irregular. About the time you settle into a pattern with your son or daughter, they change it on you. Don't compare your kids to your friends. It's self-defeating.
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• Sleep requires strategy in seasons. In the newborn stage, you may need a rotation. In the toddler stage, a sleep-training clock. Even older, they can sleep on a couch in your room.
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• Sleep can be scary for kids. When they can communicate their emotions, take time to listen and reassure them and build connection.

You will feel rested and alive again someday, I promise. In the meantime, catch up when you can and know that you won't stay sleep-deprived forever.

I've slept in the hallway to make sure my 3yr old stayed in her room.
I've slept in the car on a road trip at a rest stop along the interstate.
I've slept on the floor on a camping mattress in my 1yr olds room.
I've slept in a chair sitting up with a newborn in my arms.
I've slept on the couch with my family all piled together.
I've slept almost anywhere when my kids were little.

To quote the famous Vince Lombardi, "Fatigue makes cowards of us all."

Admitting you're tired is part of parenting. Taking care of your mind, body, and heart in this season is important to your family's health too.

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1-Year Reflections

For anyone interested, I thought I would share a few things I've experienced and learned after writing this small parenting newsletter for 52 weeks in a row.

1. Making it a non-negotiable commitment to my week has been a good discipline. I'm personally better because I chose to write it.
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2. I would never have written roughly 30,000 words for parents of 3-13 year olds had I not taken it one week at a time.
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3. I have read different (and more) books than I otherwise would have had I not needed to be writing every week.
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4. I would love for this newsletter to continue as a value add for parents, and I'm also considering a financial component to it as well. Truth be told, that's intimidating to me.
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5. Occasionally I'm stopped at lunch or at a game around town by someone who reads it. Being thanked for what I've written is as good as it gets. Replies back are a close second.
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6. It is fun to tell people I'm a writer. It feels like a job someone had 50+ years ago and I get confused looks, but I'm ok with it.
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7. I've loved the trial & error of learning. From subject lines to tech stack to readability to the length of each week's writing, I've enjoyed the tinker effect. Maybe I've messed with it too much, I'm not sure.
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8. I have more empathy for young parents like you. I've loved talking with brave parents who care about their kids and want to be the best parents they can be. I've heard and been reminded often how challenging your season of parenting is. My heart continues to feel the highs and lows of your everyday life.
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9. I'm more aware of myself as a father. I've been pushed to be a better dad to my kids in our specific season as a family because I've written this every week. I'm thankful for that.